Clean Your Room!

Matt and Mandy have a son, Max.

Max’s room is a mess.

Whose approach is more effective at motivating Matt to clean his room? Matt or Mandy?

Here’s Matt:
“Why haven’t you cleaned your room? I’ve asked you five times!!”
“I told you to clean your room. Why don’t you listen?”
“I don’t get it. It’s so easy to keep a room clean. Just do it!”

Here’s Mandy:
“Can I ask you a really stupid question? What’s one good thing that can come from having a clean room?”

Max: “I’d be able to find my games easier.”
Mandy: “Oh, that’s a great one.”
Mandy: “How do you think you’d feel if you had a clean room and could find any game you want?”
Max: “I’d like it. But I don’t know where to start.”
Mandy: “I see. Cleaning up a large mess can feel overwhelming.”
Max: “I know.”
Mandy: “What’s one small place you might start with?”
Max: “With my games, I guess.”
Mandy: “I agree with you.”
Mandy: “I’ll get you started by putting this game away.”
Max: “Thanks mom. I’ll do the rest.”

Mandy right?

Mandy asks questions to discover Max’s motivation for cleaning his room. It’s called motivational interviewing. People are motivated to change for their reasons, not yours.

Matt is lecturing. Nobody likes being told what to do.

Why am I talking about this?

Prospects are more motivated to change based on their reasons, not yours.

How do you find your prospect’s motivation?

Shift from telling to asking.

Example for an inbound lead:

“Before I get started talking about my triathlon training approach, you’ve probably done some research on coaching. What do you think a coach might help you do better?”

Then listen.

Prospects will tell you their value proposition rather than you telling them yours.

People don’t buy because they understand you. They buy because you understand them.